Opinion > Columnists > Randy Scholfield

  Randy Scholfield  

Paris Hilton, 1; our energy future, 0

The conventional wisdom is that John McCain had a good week. That's right, if you define "good week" as losing a debate with Paris Hilton.

Welcome to Energy Week on the campaign trail, in which both candidates rolled out big energy ideas involving retooling Detroit for hybrid cars (Barack Obama) and expanding nuclear energy (McCain) and allowing offshore drilling (McCain and Obama, both in energy-saving pander mode).

But what really got the news cycles spinning? Tire gauges. And Paris Hilton.

Isn't our democracy great?

Speaking about high gas prices, Obama suggested that people could make a difference by keeping their cars tuned up and the tires properly inflated.

The GOP pounced.

McCain and Co. were positively giddy. McCain, speaking to the Sturgis, S.D., motorcycle rally, barked to the crowd, "My opponent doesn't want to drill. He doesn't want nuclear power. He wants you to inflate your tires."

The well-oiled GOP mockery machine quickly produced tire gauges labeled "Obama's Energy Plan." Operatives sensed they'd hit one out of the park.

Except... the tire inflation idea is a good one.

Underinflated tires waste about 1.2 billion gallons of gas each year, according to the Energy Department, which has long urged motorists to keep their tires inflated.

Every energy expert on the planet says the same thing.

Those liberal namby-pambies at NASCAR also point out the importance of proper tire pressure for car performance. United Parcel Service recently offered gas-saving tips, including "make sure your tires are properly inflated." Ditto AAA.

So McCain, who fancies himself a conservation hero in the mold of Teddy Roosevelt, found himself in the awkward position of ridiculing efficiency and conservation. He sounded more like Dick Cheney than TR.

Odd: Why would a party that champions thrift and personal responsibility mock a policy that incorporates those values?

Obama had a good comeback: "It's like these guys take pride in being ignorant."

Within hours, McCain flip-flopped, saying that "we ought to all inflate our tires, and I don't disagree with that.... but I also don't think that that's a way to become energy independent."

For the record: Obama never claimed that inflating tires alone would make America energy independent.

But if there was a winner of Energy Week, it was Paris Hilton. She was the subject of one of those "funny" GOP smear ads, which portrayed Obama as nothing but a vapid celebrity like Paris.

Hilton responded with a wicked spoof ad in which she called McCain that "white-haired dude" while visual images likened him to the Cryptkeeper. Noting that apparently she was a presidential candidate now, she laid out an energy plan that borrowed from both campaigns.

There's some justice that in taking a vapid, low-road strategy, McCain has found himself upstaged by Paris Hilton, the ultimate vapid celebrity. Her mother (a McCain contributor) scored debating points as well, calling McCain's ads "a complete waste of the country's time and attention" and a "completely frivolous way to choose the next president of the United States."

Ouch. Like I said, a good week for McCain.

This tire flap raises an interesting point: Both candidates suggest putting America on a war footing to solve our energy crisis and bring gas price relief. But what, if anything, are Americans willing to do or sacrifice to win this effort?

Americans, once known for their frugality, ignore any suggestion that they slow down or turn up the thermostat or alter their wasteful lifestyles in any way.

That's why we richly deserve $4-a-gallon gas.

The Greatest Generation helped win World War II by rationing gasoline and collecting scrap metal and growing victory gardens. It proved that small individual actions could collectively make a big difference.

Where is that spirit now? Who's asking Americans for any kind of sacrifice in the war for energy independence?

Not McCain. At the motorcycle rally, he called the roar of revving engines the "sound of freedom."

Here's another sound:

Psssssssssssssssssssssssssst.

It's the sound of our nation's energy future deflating.

Randy Scholfield is an Eagle editorial writer. His column appears on Fridays. Reach him at 316-268-6545 or rscholfield@wichitaeagle.com.